Greetings from The Weed Witch Cave
A psychic guide to magical living in the Age of Death
(Photo by Brad Danner Photography)
Good morning! Reporting live to you from The Weed Witch Cave during Coronavirus Global Meltdown 2020, where stores in Brooklyn are currently in complete pandemonium. Twitter is having an anxiety attack, Naomi Campbell is sending haute couture face mask air kisses to Italy, literally all news is bad news, and it’s every person for themselves. JFC. Here I thought dating in New York was bad enough, but now we’re essentially in the throes of a full-on Michael Crichton thriller.
Depending on who you talk to, there’s a 50-50 chance of operating business as usual or full-on panic. There is also a 100% chance that you are going to die. Are you quarantined yet? Are things chill? Are you smoking a joint or eating an edible or hitting dabs? Do you wish you were? Can I come over or do you have COVID-19? Do you hate the person you’re quarantined with or are you watching Walking Dead marathons? Actually, those two do not have to be mutually exclusive. What is your snack/rations situation? Do you have enough toilet paper? I will be providing regular updates from national and foreign Weed Witch correspondents.
Good thing you’re on the internet, and no better time than the present to consider tempering the harsh cruelties of the world than engaging in a cannabis-fueled, existentialist-pragmatic, post-modern newsletter. Lets inject a little pragmatic magic realism into this fire tire, shall we? Some whimsy and weed? Survivalist tips as we hurtle towards an uncertain future, long-form stream-of-consciousness writing for professional amateurs and deviants. Or whatever.
The Weed Witch is a psychic guide to magical living in the Age of Death. For the lifestyle rich succumbed to becoming credit poor. Or rather: lifestyle poor and credit poor, but in good spirits! It’s like if Martha Stewart and Ina Garten had a stoned Depression Era baby raised by M.F.K. Fisher, co-parented by the ghost of Copernicus, bedazzled like a drag queen, but righteous as a riot grrl. Entertaining and useful — the best of all worlds!
So, if you’re feeling stuck somewhere between the real world and the spiritual world, where truth is stranger than fiction, this is a magically real, cannabis-fueled newsletter just for you. Lifestyles of the credit poor and unfamous. For the healers and dealers, saints and sinners. The stoners’ guide to anti-GOOP living during the crumble of the Western Empire. Discover delicious edibles, healing tinctures, and holistic remedies from the natural world and beyond. Pragmatic solutions inspired by Depression Era grandmothers and time- and space-traveling mystics. Stream-of-consciousness tales, scrappy DIY craft ideas, and divine wisdom from free-thinking societal outliers, a.k.a. the weed witches. Updates from myself and the 57-year-old lesbian I am quarantined with as we just try to stay alive. An idea sampler platter and content wildcard for your inbox.
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