Consumption Lounge: Hot Amnesia Haze August
Different month, same summer
Hey everyone,
Guess how much I paid for one scoop of ice cream the other night? EIGHT FUCKING DOLLARS. And it wasn’t even in a cone! I hate it! Will we ever have normal ice cream prices again?
Good news: there’s a new moon you can wish on right now. Just visualize a future with normal ice cream prices where a tablet won’t ask if you want tip an extra dollar on your $8 scoop for the counter person who should probably be making $20/hour, and also they might starting accepting cash again as legal tender. To do this, make a small tincture with calming aromatic oils and some quartz or selenite, write your intentions to release bad vibes while inviting in normal ice cream prices, light it ablaze, and maybe the universe will deliver. It’s the least it could do right now, amirite?
I think Kamala should change her campaign marketing strategy to “Kamala 2024: Make Ice Cream Affordable Again.” You may be thinking that this sounds a little too similar to Trump’s “Make America Great Again,” but frankly that seems to be working really well for him, so might not be a bad idea. Maybe someone will accidentally vote for her simply based on the progressive universal agreement that, yes, ice cream is too goddamn expensive in this country right now. I’ll take it!
Speaking of Kamala, I’ve signed up to attend a community meeting with Indivisible on Wednesday, Aug 14, 2024. Are you free to join me? Use this link to sign up: https://mobilize.us/s/8mPEbe
We’re now into Analog August, roaring straight through Leo season and into ***M E R C U R Y R E T R O G R A D E*** for the next three weeks. In short: different month, same summer. I made a new playlist that’s admittedly a little late summer aggro, but only because Brat Summer has officially shifted to Cranky Chub Rub Summertime Sadness, the tipping point when it’s too hot and everyone is unhinged (including yours truly—July was notably moody and erratic AF). To the relief of some, I pulled an elder Millennial move by making sure that none of the songs on this playlist came out in the last decade. May that bring you some comfort during these chaotic times—preferably with some uplifting Amnesia Haze, which just feels like the right strain since Mercury Retrograde always leaves everyone a little tongue-tied and disoriented anyway.
OK, now that I got that off my chest, it’s time to talk about wellness and my favorite things! In the words of my old friend, Laura Louise: “Be your own Oprah.” That mantra really did stick with me for so many years because sometimes you really do have to be your own Oprah: your own hype person, your own shoulder to cry on, your own reminder to be good to yourself and other people. Oprah isn’t on the TV anymore to tell you what to do, where you think you’re coming for the new car episode but it actually ends up being the Dr. Phil episode on marriage and money—sometimes you just gotta figure it out without her, be it the new car, the marriage and money, or how all of it is probably connected to some kind of underlying childhood trauma. Being sensitive isn’t easy!
Anyway, that’s why the Consumption Lounge is here: to tell you how to be nice to yourself and other people. Treat yourself with all of my favorite things below and the power to become your own Oprah. Your own, very stoned Oprah.
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Inhale/Exhale
Do you suffer from “tech neck” from sitting at your desk all day? Feel a crack every time that you try to sit up straight or worried about injury prevention? Maybe you’re having a hard time focusing on reading or just staying present in the moment. Here’s a little secret: Pilates is good for all of that.
Joseph Pilates was somewhat of an eccentric wellness genius years ahead of his time, which is maybe why I gravitate towards it so much—it’s a bit of a thinking person’s exercise. A former German boxer inspired by studying the movements of animals and yoga while interned in hospital on the Isle of Man during World War I (not a Nazi; I checked!), he developed a holistic system called Contrology, fashioning the crude prototypes for the original apparatus using raw materials like the springs on the hospital beds for an early version of the reformer and a beer barrel for the barrel ladder intended to help bed-ridden patients to get exercise.
He made a lot of claims—and some of them need to be taken with a grain of salt. Among them: in his book “The Art of Contrology,” he says that doing Pilates every day was so good for you that you could smoke a pack of cigarettes and drink a six pack and be healthy as a horse. In fact, he used smoke cigars and drink beer while teaching, which makes sense considering this was the 1950s—even though the idea of trying to do the Hundred in a room that smells like Richard’s Bar in Chicago makes me gag. Ironically, he died from advanced emphysema from smoking all of those cigars.
That said, he wasn’t a total crackpot. He developed an entire integrate movement technique rooted in kinesiology with a very specific order intended to strengthen the body’s core powerhouse, using breath work to stimulate circulation and leveraging the power of words through visual cues to establish a true mind-body connection. Not only does this help the individual understand how to interact with their own bodies and think about how they carry themselves within the world, but it literally opens neural pathways to improve coordination, listening, precision and control. Most health and fitness professionals agree that it’s an amazing complement to enhance sports training, injury prevention, and recovery, as well as an incredible tool for mental health and stress relief. (This is why I lean more foundational and classical in my teaching, but embrace contemporary techniques where they make sense).
I’ve written before about my own journey with Pilates and why I decided to become certified. Among those reasons: it’s life-long learning. Even the basics never get easier, because it’s about a maintaining a commitment to yourself to remain engaged in continual practice and finding new ways to challenge yourself. Being able to share that gift with others as a teacher has been such a tremendous privilege and rewarding to help my clients become stronger and move through the world more confidently.
If you’re in New York, I will be teaching two classes in Manhattan at Core Pilates NYC this Saturday, August 10 at 9am and 10am. You can book those here. If you’d like to book a private session with me (including virtual and group bookings), you can drop me a line at pilatesxcarly@gmail.com. Finally, I do have a Substack I never update, but I might someday, so please feel free to sign up!
Smoke Show
Last week, I was invited to come meet the folks from The Bettering Company, a Chicago-based, LGTBQ+ owned gourmet edibles company using better-for-you premium ingredients who just made their New York debut and gearing up to launch in Ohio and New Jersey. Let me tell you: these edibles are memorable. Their Himalayan Salt Dark Chocolates use fair trade cocoa (as everyone should!!) and activated with flavorless THC oil, delivering a chocolate experience that could easily square off against any non-infused chocolate bar. Also, I love that they’re individually portioned to prevent blooming in the fridge and lightly dosed as a perfect nightcap with a glass of wine. You’d think I’d be tired of gummies by now (usually I usually am), but how can you hate flavors like fennel fig, hibiscus chamomile thyme, and watermelon chili with Tajin?! (Plus, their blackberry lemonade nighttime gummies will knock you out hard).
Treat yourself or someone you love to a Gatsby era inspired fantasy with this absolutely stunning Jane West Twenties Collection, a timeless smokeware drop celebrating the evolution of jazz cigarettes into a 21st century legalization movement on the cusp of ending prohibition. Featuring durable and heat resistant solid borosilicate glass, each piece is intricately cut in four elegant shades. Upgrade your coffee table with something that says, “I value myself and have worth as a sophisticated stoner.”
It’s been a hot minute since I’ve done dabs, but I couldn’t resist the opportunity to test drive the AUXO CENOTE Ultimate Concentrate E-Rig from CCELL. This handheld and lightweight concentrate e-rig delivers super smooth hits with three preset temp settings and customizable Pro Mode, including immersive lighting effects—not particularly necessary, but why not? Because we’re living in the future, it is also Type-C and wireless charging enabled. Unlike other handheld dry herb vapes, this one has the chamber for water which is where you’ll really feel the difference on your lungs. And right now the price point is super low at $160 vs normal retail price of $400, so no better time to throw down. (Unless you’re diligent about Mercury Retrograde, in which case you might need to wait a few weeks with fingers crossed).
If there’s one thing I love about cannabis, it’s a solid artist collab. Which is why I’m jazzed to share Timeless’ latest Artist Legacy collab with Phoenix-based multidisciplinary artist, Nyla Lee, who reshapes portraits through vibrant imagery. The vape flip case and battery combo is now available online and in dispensaries in Arizona, California, Missouri, New Jersey, Ohio, and Oklahoma.
MORE WEED READS
Better late than never: Snoop Dogg opens an LA dispensary
Kamala Harris is the first major presidential candidate to back marijuana legalization
California weed hotel named among Time’s top 100 places to stay for 2024
Shop smart: Fentanyl-laced weed found at unlicensed Connecticut smoke shop
Drink Up
Le Phin, a super cute and cozy Vietnamese cafe in Manhattan’s East Village that always has the best coffee and tea drinks ever just rolled out a new one: lotus seed latte with macadamia nut milk. I cannot even begin to explain how good this is. Why was it not in my life earlier? Why am I not drinking it right now? Will I drink it tomorrow? It’s so rich, creamy, and fragrant with just the softness bit of sweetness. If you end up having this, please tag me in your next post. (Unlike you didn’t like it, in which case please leave me out of that drama).
About a week ago, I was up in the Catskills again when I finally made it to the new location for 2 Queens Coffee, a cult favorite roastery in Narrowsburg, New York. Not only was the coffee amazing (I bought two bags because I’m a fiend), but the Quiche Lorraine was next level. The new location also has an incredible view of the Delaware River and plenty of seating to chill out uninterrupted with a good book or friend.
Want to let the dog days of summer linger a little longer? Pick up a bottle of Pollinator Spirits honey-infused Bonfire Rye, which has all the campfire vibes. Made in small batches from owner/distiller Claire M. Marin, she uses honey hand-harvested from her own apiary to make every bottle. Huge fan over here!
Listen, drinking in New York City is expensive. I barely do it anymore unless it’s a special occasion or I’m not paying, which is why I’m such a huge fan of the Martini Hour at Dante West Village where you can get their whole line-up of martinis for $10, including their signature Upside Down Dirty Gibson with Dolin Blanc, Cinzano Dry, The Botanist gin, and pickled onion brine. IT IS SO GOOD (and I especially like it when it’s not full price!)
I thought hard seltzer was bad enough, but then JD Vance decided to make a TikTok about it.
See & Do
If you live near an Alamo Drafthouse, their season pass basically pays for itself if you go to more than one movie per month. And frankly, after watching MaXXXine, I might have to use that perk to see it more than once in the theater! Yes, I know Mia Goth is presently being sued for doing pretty abusive shit and bullying a background actor, but so did Naomi Campbell and we all still love her! Problematic fave! This movie was so good and hit all the right notes for the X trilogy.
Pilobolus is still playing at the Joyce Theater for another week — go, go, go!
Keanu Reeves and Alex Winter to make totally excellent Broadway debut of Waiting for Godot in 2025
MORE FROM THE CONSUMPTION LOUNGE
Consumption Lounge: July Summer Smoke Show
Consumption Lounge: The 2024 Guide to 4/20 in NYC and Beyond
Consumption Lounge: Mercury Retrograde Edition
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